Belinda's story-life in Ndhiwa

My name is Belinda .I am a girl; I am in class 8 at Pala Primary School Ndhiwa Division.  I was born in 1987. My father's name is Felix and my mother's name is Michelle she  is  69 years old . My father is a polygamist with four wives and 37 biological children .My mother is the third wife with the children. My father did not care about the wives as it is often the way in Kenya that a man marries many wives and the wives are left to take care of their children and meet all other family needs by themselves.  My mother was not employed and could sell small fish (omena) to buy us clothes and food. Sometimes we could go without food for 3 or 4 days, and father could come home demanding money from my mother for alcohol and if not given, she could be beaten almost to death.

Despite all of this my mother struggled to educate my elder brother unfortunately he died after working for only 6 months. He did not bring any change to our poverty; we were faced instead with my mother being even poorer.  People take advantage of such opportunities, so I happened to meet a man who had a wife already, but who pretended to be loving and sympathise with my situation. He was ten years older than me but I was forced to marry him by my father who wanted a dowry since he had a lot of cows. I was sold to that man prematurely when I was only fifteen years old, first year was bed of roses, but come third year when he went to away to a  far place and left us together with his first  -wife to look after and  feed our children .

By then I had given birth to two children.  The eldest is a boy called Tevian born in 2003 and a girl called Cynthia born in 2006.They are both in nursery, top class and baby class respectively. Tevian was left with me by his father when he was one year old when he went to fish and stayed at the beach where we learned later that he got a woman who he stayed with temporarily as a wife and this made him to forget us completely. I suffered with my boy, no food to eat till he became pale and developed marasmus*.  I remember occasions when I could have nothing to eat and go from house to house for my children to be fed on the left over ugali and could be chased away like a dog. 

*Marasmus is a form of emaciation and wasting in an infant due to protein-energy malnutrition

 My father in law that I was left with used me as a maid I could go to dig a spring water to get his own cows drink but could not even drink a glass of milk from the same cow, not even my son. what happened  made me decide to go back to school. 

Tevian and Cynthia go to school at Alara primary, when they come back from school, they find it very difficult even to bathe and to have their clothes washed since my mum can do very little due to old age but I am determined to study .Most of their clothes are torn and has only two good ones for going to church this is because if mum spend money on their clothes they can have nothing to eat. Another problem is fees as in Kenya nursery teachers are paid by the parents of the children they teach and many times they are sent back home for fees and have got huge debts even arrears from last year. This lowers their performance. They carry their books in a polythene bags which keeps on getting torn and they loose their pencils. Shoes are history, most of the time goes to school bare feet ,if a  sympathiser as not shown mercy .

I suffered for five years from the year 2002-2007 when I decided to  go back to school and start from class seven under the influence and encouragement  of my sister who is a teacher and only one employed in our house. She was lucky to have been educated by her husband unlike my other sisters who were also forced in marriage like me and suffers alike .She persuaded me to go back to class seven last year and this year I’m in std eight.

I am determined to be a lawyer in future. I am very good at Mathematics, Geography and History (Social studies).

My hobbies are;

1.Travelling      

2.Reading novels            

3. Athletics                       

4. Netball and long jump 

How I have spent my years  

1987-1989-Childhood 

1990-1993-Pre-Unit 

1994-2001-std1-8 

2002-2007-Forced marriage

 2008-2009-Std7-Std8 at Pala primary school.